A long time ago, in a slightly different universe, I used to blog. I used to think that whatever insane thoughts my deranged brain came up with might be interesting or useful to someone out there, so I shared them. What a fool. The past three years have shown me that thoughts are only appreciated when they fit the forms people require of them. But no one tells me what these forms are – not even when I go and ask directly. This might be a function of the place/country I live in (Germany), or it might be a function of the times (the now), or even a function of me (someone who talks too much and too often addresses all problems directly). Philosophical ideas, technological concepts, art and all creative undertakings, everything new and heretofore unknown: they have to conform to forms of the past. One either becomes a conformist; or someone who sets up forms for others to conform to, an emperor in one’s own little empire which sometimes stretches no further than one’s own body. This wonderful situation quickly devolves into a ceaseless competition to grow into either a more and more efficient and soulless conformist, or a more and more powerful emperor. Life becomes compartmentalized into little bands of people with their little leaders and their little internal struggles and competitions. Whole societies get divided and subdivided and sub-subdivided like this. No democracy in this – and no equality either. No creativity. And definitely no pleasure in anything at all.
So little empresses and emperors go around, deciding whom to take into their little corporative bands, and whom to ditch. Those whose usefulness, however defined, has run out get the boot very quickly. They are not informed about the imperial decisions, they just stop being invited to the parties or called or written to with interesting news. They stop being cared about. They stop being appreciated. Until that strange moment when their services might be needed again; then the empresses are quick to grab the phone or punch the keyboard or come ringing the bell. Personal relationships work like this. Corporations work like this. Schools and universities work like this. Societies and nations work like this. The whole of humanity seems to be working like this today. Trouble is, we only have one planet for now, and this kind of truly insane behaviour – fundamentally divisive and extremely competitive, all to the point of absolutist thinking – will lead to yet another world war. It might be a gun-and-knife, plane-and-tank-and-mine-and-H-bomb war. It might also be some cyberwar where one side electronically shuts off the electricity in hospitals and shelters in the middle of Northern winter and equatorial summer, while the other proceeds to blast the skies and the highways with EMPs. In all cases, thinking in absolutes which paint competition and divisiveness as the sole good things can only be considered insanity.
What can one do then? Can there be some meaningful response to all of this? I doubt that. The chances will always be slim when one goes alone against mentalities and cultural anti-values which have taken root through decades of propaganda, brain-washing and lies about the reality of things. But then, what else is there to do in this life? Lie down and die? Join this global social insanity and repeat its mantras? Become clinically insane, sink into dissociation and lose all touch with reality? These cannot be put in the category of serious options. If nothing else, one has to fight and fall in an abstract battle with divisiveness: that would be an honourable thing to do. The only other way seems to lie in the path of combatting fire with fire: fight insanity with nothing else but insanity. This is the road of your doublethink which outdoublethinks their doublethink. Rarely have I written insaner sentences than the previous one, but desperate times call for desperate measures. And that’s that.
On a final note: you should probably not read this blog. It will talk about heavy music, about books and films, about politics, about computer games, about my dissertation, about any projects I might have, and so forth. But probably all of it will be useless. People constantly share their opinions on the net anyway; my useless contributions will surely go unnoticed most of the time. In the end, it’s slightly better to be useless most of the time than to be used and abused all the time.